Just a guy far from home sharing skewed views and ridiculous rants for your reading pleasure. This blog is mostly harmless. Mostly.

Links to older posts are listed in the subtopics link to your right. Lower. Lower. TOO LOW!

Lower...

The Spa Who Loved Me - Sri Lanka Diaries 1/8/2014

So up to this point I had explored Kandy and the ancient city on a huge rock, I had seen people eat fire and I had been soaked, I had visited thousands of types of plants all beautifully gardened, and I ran up my first 15,000 tab.

Not a bad start, but this was just a warm up.

The trip we took to Pinnuwela to ride the elephants was on our way to our next stop.  Since I kind of piggybacked onto this trip, the first two places I stayed were already selected by the 3 people who "planned" the trip, (most emphatic air quotes, ever).  The first place was a nice house on the river, but the next place was a spa in Balapitiya.

Now, if you know me...actually you probably don't so I will explain...

I don't "do" spa.

I don't even consider them.

I just don't get the appeal of this:

What did that dog eat!?

The thought of walking around a spa with seaweed in my underwear and cucumbers on my eyes all while covered in strawberry volcano ash does not really get me out of bed in the morning.

However, I have been wrong in the past...so it would be time to see if that could ever happen again.

The good news to start:  The other three traveling companions had all gotten one bigger room together, which left me with a single room to myself down the hall a little ways.

Score!

I had the laptop, the means to connect it to the TV, the movie drives...I had it all.  So I was pretty well set to jet.

We arrive at the spa about 6 or 7 hours after we left Kandy - the elephants took like an hour, and while the roads are actually pretty good - the rain and the fact that there were other drivers just kind of made it drag on and on.

The three companions get their room, and I find out I made a mistake and booking was off by a day - no problem, I paid out some cash and got my room about 30 minutes later.  While they prepped it all I took a little stroll around the grounds to see what I was up against...

Giant Koi pond?  Sure...I guess...if you're into that wort of thing.

View from the outdoor covered breakfast area?  Meh.

Fully decked out lobby/hall with all kinds of Christmas decorations made from local plants?  Whatever.

I guess a giant tree cross-section pad painted gold over a pond is cool...I guess...

I have no-fucking-clue what this is but it terrified me into loving it.

CONCRETE CROCODILE SPRAY FOUNTAIN!? 
OH MY GOD THIS MAY BE HEAVEN.

While it was small, it was a pretty outstanding place.  It was by far the nicest place in town to stay, and was about $75 USD a night.  You could pay extra for things like massages and acupuncture and treatments and all that, but if you didn't want it - they didn't try to force it on you.  I like that.

My event was all up in Nature...and the different difference was delightful.

I get to my room - I wasn't really expecting much.  Like I said it was a single room and this place was designed for couples.  But, it had AC and a TV so I would be happy with just about anything that wasn't a van driving on a rain soaked byway.

Holy crap!  There were 2 towel swans, but when they saw I was alone they took out the matching set of everything and asked when my special person would be joining me.
Awwwwwkwaaarrrdd.

The bathroom was pretty nice - cool shower.  I took a shower first thing, but it was ice cold.  I think because I kind of showed up early they were in a rush to get it all set and forgot to flip the switch. Was taken care of quickly.

Then I went and took a look to see what my view would be like for the next 4 days.  A lot to live up to judging by everything I had seen so far.

Well shit.  That'll do.

That'll do nicely.

So, yeah.  This place was pretty tops.  I had a long day of travel and not sleeping well at the last place, (the traveling companion who was in the room with 2 beds had an issue with snoring so I slept on the couch in the living room for the 4 days) so I put on some Hercules: The Legendary Journeys and had a few drinks to kind of wind down.  I would hit the breakfast tomorrow and see how it went - breakfast was included in the price, so I didn't have high hopes.

I live here now.

Fresh fruit juice, coffee or tea, egg dish, sausage or ham, and a special treat of string hoppers with 3 different curries.  

String Hoppers:  is a type of pancake made with fermented rice batter and coconut milk. It is a popular food in South Indian states of Kerala and Tamil Nadu. It is also very popular in Sri Lanka where it is commonly referred to by its anglicized name as Hoppers. It is eaten most frequently for breakfast or dinner.

One tuk tuk driver described them as "kind of terrible"...I won't argue, they tasted like welfare noodles, but they did come with curry that was pretty tasty.

This place was winning on all fronts.  I ate all of that...all of it...and went back to take a hot shower and get ready for the day.  Now, I have previously mentioned that my traveling companions had planned the trip - so I asked what the plan was for the next 4 days...

Nothing.

Okay, cool.  I went and grabbed a tuk tuk into town and asked him to give me a tour of the place, hit the small market for much needed snacks, and then hit the wine/beer store on the way back because...well, beer.

Check.

Check.

Annnnd check.  Ahhhhhh.  Engage comfort.

While there were no plans I did look around some for a few things to do...but fate would have another plan for me.

To start with, we arrived late on the 23rd, so it was now the 24th.  There was a Christmas dinner I will cover next tonight, and I really could use the day to relax after I walked around and toured the lovely mask-making town of Balapitiya.

That night, around 5:30 PM, the sky decided to unleash rain like I am not certain I have ever seen.  It rained.  It double rained.  It rained so hard there was more water than air when you took a breath outside.  It was more like someone moved the town under a faucet than anything else.

No problem, we had a dinner to get to.  I noticed that there was a pain in my left leg, just below the knee.  While I will spare you the gory details, this made me kind of nervous from some previous health issues I have had that were...ongoing, let's say.

But I went down to the dinner after trying to keep it elevated as much as I could.

Ah yes...the dinner.  I am no poet and verse is a curse for me...so I will let the thousand words each of these pictures tell describe the 7 course meal I had...

Prawn thingie...

\
Seafood Bisque

Orange Icy Thing

Fruit stuffed Lamb with carrots and potatoes and some sauce stuff

Fresh blue berries on some cheesy cake.

I was so into it I forgot to document two of the dishes.  One was a tiny salad thingie and the other was a pre-desert desert I don't remember.  But every.single. thing. was absolutely delicious.  I was truly happy.  I wasn't stuffed, but everything was perfect.

On top of that, they brought a special friend!

This poor guy had a porcelain white smiling rosy-cheeked Santa mask on...he gave us all herbal wine and then rode off in the back of his magical Isuzu pickup truck.

I returned to my room through the rain, a bit of a limp starting to develop...but I had RICE on my side from previous experience so I knew how to best take care of it.  I was hours from the nearest city with anything that could be described as a modern hospital, so I would just keep a close eye on it.

Back in my room for some snack and a few Lion beers and some more Hercules: The Legendary Journeys and I called it a very happy night.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

 It was finally here!

I woke up and got dressed to go to breakfast again.  I had only seen my traveling companions twice since we arrived - once when they all went to get a massage and I bumped into them and again at the Christmas Dinner.  So I was now essentially on my own.

Actually, from this point on in the trip - about 8 days left - I would only see them for maybe a few hours total.

Awesome!

So I ate breakfast alone, but the two managers were very nice and polite, and we would chat a bit while they got ready for the rest of the guests - maybe 12 in all - to work their way down.

Because of the rain all meals had been moved inside.  The limp was getting worse and I wanted to get down there, eat and get back upstairs to keep it elevated.  The food was again amazing, and I returned to have a quick shower and lay back down and watch some Hercules: The Legendary Journeys.

A few hours later I got the call from the others that they were up and it was time to exchange presents.  The Christmas was mostly for them, as all three of them were very close friends.  I ended up with some candy, a little toy gun and a sarong they picked up for a few bucks at the Kandy souk. They wanted to watch Christmas movies, so I got my computer and set it all up for them.

After two short-ish movies they were ready to nap and I had to get back to take care of the leg.  The rain at this point was intense - even more than the night before.  I essentially spent Christmas like this...

Don't be fooled, Sri Lanka has that weird "sunshine rain" thing going on...

What you can't see is how much I am enjoying watching Hercules: The Legendary Journeys.

No, YOU have a weird obsession with that show...

As time and the storm rolled on, the power would go out - and I was worried about being as remote as we were that it could be out a while.  But, Lotus Paradise came through again with their own generator.  It struggled and would go offline for maybe 30 minutes at a pop, but they kept on it - to their credit.

For dinner I decided I would actually eat food - I have this tendency while on vacation to not eat, and if I do I end up getting cheap food like I eat at home.  I just don't justify spending any real money on a meal for myself...now liquor, well that is a different story.

So I got the vegetable stir fry...it cost about $3.75 USD...

Seriously...I love this place.

And, as a bonus side effect of all of this, I got to play a new game!

BLIND WATER CATCH!

It was pitch black, and I had leaks in the ceiling - I guess with the fash on my phone to get this shot..

I know, you may be thinking this place isn't all that, but please keep in mind this was one of the most intense storms they have had in a long time, and we were hours from a city in the middle of a jungle in a 3rd world country.  A few drops from the ceiling is amazing, all things considered.

Essentially this is how it all went down:

Seriously, it was EXACTLY like this...the water was angry and Asian.

So I was blind and all ripped with muscles and whatever, but I remembered my training, (I drank beer) and was able to find each drop and place a cup or pot or can under it.  It was actually a good way to kill the time and I wouldn't mind playing again some time.

It was a chill Christmas - I got to Skype with my parents for a little bit and I got to talk to a very good friend in Australia, which always makes me feel better.

I had asked one of the managers - seriously I would go back to this place just to have them around...pure awesomeness - about taking a boat out if the weather cleared.  It didn't look good for the 26th, but our last full day there, the 27th, was supposed to be a clear day.  Okay then - I had looked online as I had seen boats cruising the river for days - and it ran about 5000 Rs, (1000 Rs is about $7.50) for a 2 hour tour.

The hotel, as it turns out, had their own boat.  The whole thing could be taken out for a few hours for 2500 Rs.  Now, if two people went, that would be split.  If ten went, split ten ways.  But, since I would be going alone I would pay it all...but $20 for the boat ride I was about to take was one of the best $20 I have ever spent...

SO TUNE IN NEXT TIME!  
SAME BLOG TIME, 
SAME BLOG STATION!



If you ever go to Sri Lanka, I can't recommend this place enough...here is the website - bookmark it!  You won't regret it!  And tell them I say hi! 
(The white guy with loud friends down the hall who ate everything for breakfast over Christmas)









No comments:

Post a Comment